The Green Lantern

Christian taking on Rod in a slide race on the play structure.... not sure about the weight limit Rod!!!

It has been a very tumultuous week in our household. We have experienced a whole gamut of emotions and events this week and I find myself sitting here in my lazy boy completely and utterly ‘done’.  The pivotal moment of the week was meeting with our Radiation Oncologist (aka: really smart guy) who spent quite a bit of time explaining to Chris and I the procedures, limits and expectations of Christian’s radiation therapy. It was unfortunately another one of those moments that left Chris and I feeling a bit sick to our stomachs as we were, once again, given a reality check in terms of Christian’s cancer. We were shown the re-grading scans of Christian’s tumor and were quite shocked to see how large the tumor still is – and just how big it was when we first started.  He was able to show us the two scans (initial and most recent) superimposed on one another, and we were amazed to see how much it had actually shrunk. The tumor was initially so big that if it were in his body right now at that initial size it would stick outside of his stomach about 2 or so inches. The majority of the shrinking has been from front to back and a bit of side to side but it has remained a very long and oddly shaped tumor. We were informed that his left kidney would get a large dose of radiation and will most likely be non-functioning when the treatment is over. As well his vertebrae, which the tumor is laying directly on top of, from his thoracic spine to his sacrum, will also get a very large dose of radiation.  This means that his growth in these segments will be affected (short like his mom!) So these are the things that we must learn to deal with and process, as they are the necessary evils associated with getting rid of the rest of this tumor through radiation.  So much to take in and process – both Chris and I shed a few tears (thanks Tracey!) and took some time getting used to what this next phase of his treatment will be like.  Please continue to pray that the tumor releases itself from his main vessel so that surgery could be done to remove the remaining tissue (if there is any left after it is done getting blasted….) I am going to start calling Christian the Green Lantern from the original Justice League as he may start to glow from all the radiation he will be receiving! We must find humor in everything!!!!

Chocolate chip cookie on the patio,
in the sun, in the mountains
life is good.....really

On a brighter note we had an amazing trip out to Banff were we stayed at a great rustic lodge and took our first step out on a ledge with Christian. We were swimming in the pool with Evan and Ryan and Christian showed up and pressed his little nose against the glass and looked at the pool and his siblings longingly – I am sure I heard my heart breaking. I couldn’t take his disappointment anymore so we strapped on his suit, I covered his central lines water tight, threw on the life jacket and sent him down the towering three storey waterslide.  It was an amazing sight and he was so happy. The best part was after he was done he had a nice hot shower and he stood there forever with the hot water running down his back and I realized it was a sensation that he had not felt in four months. I felt so good for him – Even though he is a 3 year old and doesn’t react the same way an adult would with cancer (he plays, doesn’t really complain, forgets as soon as treatment is done) there are many things I know he does think about and desire. He told me as I was sealing up his chest opening – “When all this is over and these tubes come out of my chest, I’m coming back here and going on all this stuff!”  And I said you bet you are!

 

So despite the highs and lows of the week (there is so much more to tell but this blog is already WAY to long….) we are happy and enjoying Christian and Evelyn and Ryan – with his first tooth today!

Today I am thankful for:

1.     waterslides

2.     hot showers

3.     the smell of outside after the rain